When it comes to traveling, I have one main philosophy: if it takes less than 20 hours to drive, there is no point in flying - in other words, engage car travel!. This has remained the fundamental principle underlying many of the exciting and often absurd situations I have found myself in over the years, enjoying North America adventure!

Luckily, I have never had much of a problem finding others to share these strange journeys and roadside attractions with. As such, I have engaged many a folk in equally bizarre and humorous situations that will surely be the focal point of drunken conversation for many years to come.

Equally important and amusing are lessons that can be learned:

• Just because you can order hand grenades in New Orleans doesn't mean that you should order an army's worth.
• Drinking salsa in Arkansas is only a good idea if it gets you out of driving to St. Louis.
• Nashville is a great place to go if you want to meet has-been heavy metal stars from the 1980s.
• Although it's possible to buy 3 hot dogs and a 24 oz Bud Light for under $5.00 in the United States, it's not necessarily the best idea.
• Frankenmuth, Michigan is not intended for those on a strict diet prohibiting copious amounts of pork and microbrews.
• Winnipeg is aptly nicknamed Winter Pig for a reason.
• Driving through the Maritimes is foolish in December.
• Being ill in planters outside the Tropicana casino in Atlantic City earns a wide variety of expression and vibe.

In closing, I offer you this: fill your tank with gas, grab a map and stock up on cheesies and chips. It's a jungle out there - make sure you have something to feed the bears!

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Last modified: September 02 2008 13:59:32.